I thought having a baby would…

• end my career
• ruin my marriage
• be full of tedious work
• end of many friendships
• end my social life
• make me boring

Instead, having a baby has…

• given me a new passion for my work
• increased the joy in my marriage
• shown me that tedious work for your own baby is actually fun
• started and bloomed many new friendships
• started a whole new social world
• made me more alive with energy with new perspectives

We hear so many negative reasons why people don’t want to have kids. I’m here to tell you that if you have a good foundation and joy in your life, a baby will enhance everything you already have.  Now…get to baby making!

Mark your calendars people!

Mark and I are planning on inducing on July 20th. I’m so excited that I’ve peed my pants several times…

On Saturday, Mark and I attended the much dreaded Childbirth class at our hospital to prepare ourselves for the coming of our baby girl.

As horrific as the videos were, we actually left the 8-hour class feeling really good and much more prepared for what awaits us. 

There are so many important moments and events in our life that don’t come with an instructional class which makes me think - childbirth must be the most important event of them all. 

We will observe many weddings, funerals, graduations, and anniversaries…but this special event of childbirth requires a miracle to make it happen.

6 weeks and counting…

As my due date quickly approaches (JULY 24), I am realizing that my life will never be the same. It is a new life in every sense of the phrase – a new life in my baby girl, a new life for me, a new life for Mark.

Besides the most obvious of having a baby this summer, here’s what’s also changing and brewing:

• We are leaving our beloved church family at ORCC to following God’s calling to help start a church plant – Life Song Worship Center. Kick off day is Sept. 13th.
• Mark will be leaving his job that he loves in order for us to plant this church. Appliance repair anyone?
• I have started to fervently pursue my Wedding Hair and Makeup business. I’m booked almost every weekend through the end of September (except for 6 weeks where I’ll be home with baby June.) Check out my humble beginnings: Wedding Hair and Makeup
• Every room in our house has been reorganized and flooded with baby stuff. June already has more belongings than Mark and I combined. It’s like we are living in a new house.

That’s really all for now. We desperately need your prayers. The things listed above are requiring a huge amount of sacrifice, tears, and commitment from us. We won’t give up, we won’t back down, we won’t relent.

However, I consider my life worth nothing to me if only I can finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me…the task of testifying to the gospel of  God’s grace. -Acts 20:24 (I have this verse tattooed on my wrist…it has never meant more to me than right now).

Last year, I wrote this post about Mother’s Day. It was a cry from my heart to be a mom. A cry for hope.

It’s such a miracle that this year I got to celebrate mother’s day as an expectant mother. Mark rolled out the red carpet for me and really made me feel special. I was totally shocked when a few of my friends also got me cards and gifts. I think I’m really going to like Mother’s day in the future – it’s like an extra birthday!!!

As I said in the post last year – KEEP YOUR HOPES UP! Whatever you are praying for…God really does give us the desires of our hearts. This baby inside of me is a testament to God’s love and faithfulness. What more could I ask for?

This is my new phrase…as you can see below, it’s soooo true. According to the crazy fruit and vegetable comparison, my precious baby girl is the size of a head of cabbage. I don’t know why they insist on comparing my baby to food…maybe it’s because food is all I can think about these days – well, food and the baby of course. Only 9 weeks to go – here’s to the pregnant life!

Mark took this picture when I wasn't paying attention.

A thousand new thoughts go through my head every day (I’m conviced this is the reason why I forget so much “regular” stuff). Thoughts like: how can I get up as little as possible today? Wow, my wedding ring feels tighter! Whoa…look at my ankles! Is that rumbling in my stomach the taco salad or little June kicking around?

Every part of me wants to be brave and act like I’m feeling and doing great. The truth is…I’m terrified. What if my baby won’t sleep through the night, what if she has colic, should I use a pacifier? It seems everyone has an opinion about these things (a very strong opinion) and there’s so much judgement in motherhood. My friend can’t get the hang of breast feeding and she gets treated like she threw her baby down a well. The pressure is already mounting up!

As I ponder these things, I will continue to waddle around, put my feet up, and eat popsicles…

My mind and emotions have been swimming in the deep end lately. I can’t believe I haven’t posted in 2 weeks. That’s the longest I’ve ever gone without spilling my guts for the world to read.

I think it’s time for some spillage, but I can’t seem to get my thoughts in order. Tomorrow, I will have a good post. I promise. I’m not a dead link. And I’m not a mom blog (even though I can hardly keep my mind of my precious little baby girl, June). Here’s what happened in the past 2 weeks:

1. We felt June kick on the outside of my tummy for the first time – magical.
2. We had house guests from Missouri.
3. We are welcoming Joshua White into our home tonight. This will be our first “face-to-face” with anyone from the internets.
4. My face has gotten fatter – I’m fairly sure of this even though my friends swear it’s not true.
5. French fries make my feet swell up, but I can’t seem to stay away from them.
6. I started watching the HBO series, Big Love. It’s just wrong.
7. We had a snow storm and 2 snow days.
8. God taught me some lessons.
9. I miss my blog friends.

Is there such a thing as reasonable fear with the Lord?

I hear statements like, “Every good parent worries for their child.” and I can’t help but wonder if it’s true. Fear is the opposite of faith…so are we just comforting ourselves and making excuses for our fear?

I want to live FREE of fear and the promises in the Word tell me I can. Right???!?!?!?!?!

It’s OK to:

1. Not blog for a week
2. Watch TV all night long with your hubby and neglect the dishes, laundry and dirty bathrooms
3. Admit that some parts of pregnancy suck
4. Avoid the person that makes comments about certain body parts getting bigger
5. To be nervous that you won’t get to buy yourself new clothes because you’ll be buying new clothes for the baby
6. To be hungry at 8 am, 11 am, 12:30 pm, 3 pm, 6 pm, and 9 pm
7. To ask your hubby get you water, your special pillow, your laptop, a snack and the remote (in the course of 10 minutes)

Anything you need to remind yourself not to feel guilty about???

Since I’m so forgetful lately, I’ve made a list of things I continually try to remind myself of…unfortunately, my reminder usually comes too late:

1. Going to work in yesterday’s makeup is NEVER a good idea.
2. You like peas now that you’re pregnant.
3. You don’t like onions now.
4. When you have to pee in the middle of the night, it’s not as easy to “roll” out of bed.
5. You put your keys in your jacket pocket last night instead of in your purse.
6. Go ahead and get the size Medium in maternity clothes instead of the XXL in regular clothes, you’ll feel better about yourself.
7. When you feel tired on Wednesday and you call Mark to tell him you’re not coming to church, you will regret it.

Ok, I gave Mark every opportunity to blog this first, but many of you are asking so…

We are going to have a beautiful, healthy, baby

GIRL!!!

The ultrasound went perfectly and I think she is even beautiful in her very first picture:

It’s been a little quiet around my blog lately…it’s because I can’t think of anything else than my BIG ultrasound tomorrow morning where we find out if it’s a girl or boy. We would be excited for a boy or girl, but I’m more nervous about finding out if the baby is healthy. I’m so preocupied with thoughts of the appointment – I can hardly get work done, I can’t sleep and I’m just a nervous wreck. I have glimses of peace and then my mind starts wandering again. Please pray for me!

As proof of this “baby brain” as I like to call it, I accidentally posted my Social Security Number on Twitter this morning (thanks to everyone who responded to let me know!).

I can’t think of a worse thing to accidentally do on a social network. Can you?

These are the 5 songs I could listen to forever:

1. Bad – U2
2. Romeo & Juliet- Dire Straights
3. Danny’s Song – Loggins and Messina
4. It’s Your Love – Mark Thomas
5. Pony Man – Gordon Lightfoot

The reason I love these songs is because they are the soundtrack to my love affair with my husband:

1. Bad – U2 – This song was playing during our first kiss.
2. Romeo & Juliet- Dire Straights – We used to slow dance and sing this song while we were dating.
3. Danny’s Song – Loggins and Messina – We played this song at our wedding and Mark still sings it to me
4. It’s Your Love – Mark Thomas – Mark wrote this song after we had a miscarriage last year. It healed my soul.
5. Pony Man – Gordon Lightfoot – Mark sings this song to the baby at night.

What songs could you listen to forever????

Mark hinted to me that I might be a tad bit hormonal lately. Of course, I completely denied it until these things happened last week:

• I sat down in my bosses office to let him know I wasn’t satisfied with my review. Before I could say two words, I was sobbing like a baby and couldn’t catch my breath. The poor man didn’t know what to do. I’m pretty sure I didn’t make any sense and made a complete fool out of myself. I haven’t cried at work in the 4 years I’ve been here. It was humiliating.
• During our lovely Valentine’s date, I yelled at the sweet movie attendant about the parking situation before bursting into tears and demanding our money back. Again, humiliated. Good thing Mark saved the night by getting me calm and taking me home for a movie.
• I have been craving doughnut holes for weeks. This morning, I finally went to the quaint, local doughnut shop by our house to indulge myself only to be sold STORE BOUGHT, STALE doughnut holes – Winchell’s, I will cut you.  As soon as I got in my car, I cried.

I admit…I think I would have cried about the doughnuts – hormones or not!