judi free!

I heard this statement today while listening to this speech. I thought I was just going to listen to a speech about leadership – instead, I was challenged on what I BELIEVE. I guess that’s what good leaders do though. They challenge us and inspire us to believe…not to plan, but to believe.

As I was reflecting I tried to write down 100 things that I believe. I made it to number 31 before going blank. Even now, I stumble over ideas that my parents taught me or things I’ve heard in church – but when I look at my actions I have to second-guess some of my “beliefs”. For instance, I might have said “I believe the world is a beautiful place that we should protect”. However, my actions in no way support that “belief”.

How many beliefs do you have that need to be challenged or reflected by examining your actions. Go ahead – try to write down 100 things you believe. It’s harder than you think!

Last night, Mark and I had the opportunity to be inspired again. Inspiration is breath for your dreams. It’s the lifeblood of your hopes.  The funny thing about inspiration though is that you must act upon it immediately for it to have any effect on your dreams or else it becomes a cold wind of despair and dried up bones…just a hope that cannot possibly become a reality. Inspiration can even become bitterness – “how can they be so successful at it and not me?”.

So, what am I going to do with this beautiful thing called inspiration? I’m going to hide it in my heart and make 3 changes today:

1. Pray more
2. Practice more
3. Love more

It sounds simple, but really, these are the things that I neglect everyday. I know that if I’m faithful to do these things, the Lord will direct my steps and my works to align with His will. Be inspired today and make a change now.

I never truly understood the fullness of God’s love.

Until…

I had the love of my life – my daughter.

His love yearns for me
His love protects me
His love wants the best for me
His love wants me to accomplish great things
His love never fails

Now I know

The last 6 weeks have been a wonderful, dream state blur. Words don’t come close to describing the emotions and love that we have experienced.

For now, here’s a quick list of things that We are learning and experiencing:

Burping, farting, pooping and peeing are celebrated on a semi-hourly basis.

There are not enough burp cloths in the world.

Losing a pacifier at the wrong time is devastating.

Hearing my baby cry isn’t stressful.

You can become an expert at many new things in less than 6 weeks with daily practice. Case in point: diaper changing.

Being a mommy has rewards that outweigh stretch marks, 3 am feedings, and 30 extra pounds.

Praying never felt so good.

Check out junejett.com to hear about June’s adventures!

On Saturday, Mark and I attended the much dreaded Childbirth class at our hospital to prepare ourselves for the coming of our baby girl.

As horrific as the videos were, we actually left the 8-hour class feeling really good and much more prepared for what awaits us. 

There are so many important moments and events in our life that don’t come with an instructional class which makes me think - childbirth must be the most important event of them all. 

We will observe many weddings, funerals, graduations, and anniversaries…but this special event of childbirth requires a miracle to make it happen.

6 weeks and counting…

As my due date quickly approaches (JULY 24), I am realizing that my life will never be the same. It is a new life in every sense of the phrase – a new life in my baby girl, a new life for me, a new life for Mark.

Besides the most obvious of having a baby this summer, here’s what’s also changing and brewing:

• We are leaving our beloved church family at ORCC to following God’s calling to help start a church plant – Life Song Worship Center. Kick off day is Sept. 13th.
• Mark will be leaving his job that he loves in order for us to plant this church. Appliance repair anyone?
• I have started to fervently pursue my Wedding Hair and Makeup business. I’m booked almost every weekend through the end of September (except for 6 weeks where I’ll be home with baby June.) Check out my humble beginnings: Wedding Hair and Makeup
• Every room in our house has been reorganized and flooded with baby stuff. June already has more belongings than Mark and I combined. It’s like we are living in a new house.

That’s really all for now. We desperately need your prayers. The things listed above are requiring a huge amount of sacrifice, tears, and commitment from us. We won’t give up, we won’t back down, we won’t relent.

However, I consider my life worth nothing to me if only I can finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me…the task of testifying to the gospel of  God’s grace. -Acts 20:24 (I have this verse tattooed on my wrist…it has never meant more to me than right now).

Last year, I wrote this post about Mother’s Day. It was a cry from my heart to be a mom. A cry for hope.

It’s such a miracle that this year I got to celebrate mother’s day as an expectant mother. Mark rolled out the red carpet for me and really made me feel special. I was totally shocked when a few of my friends also got me cards and gifts. I think I’m really going to like Mother’s day in the future – it’s like an extra birthday!!!

As I said in the post last year – KEEP YOUR HOPES UP! Whatever you are praying for…God really does give us the desires of our hearts. This baby inside of me is a testament to God’s love and faithfulness. What more could I ask for?

A thousand new thoughts go through my head every day (I’m conviced this is the reason why I forget so much “regular” stuff). Thoughts like: how can I get up as little as possible today? Wow, my wedding ring feels tighter! Whoa…look at my ankles! Is that rumbling in my stomach the taco salad or little June kicking around?

Every part of me wants to be brave and act like I’m feeling and doing great. The truth is…I’m terrified. What if my baby won’t sleep through the night, what if she has colic, should I use a pacifier? It seems everyone has an opinion about these things (a very strong opinion) and there’s so much judgement in motherhood. My friend can’t get the hang of breast feeding and she gets treated like she threw her baby down a well. The pressure is already mounting up!

As I ponder these things, I will continue to waddle around, put my feet up, and eat popsicles…

I had the very rare opportunity to sit in a room with 150 brilliant CEOs – incredibly accomplished individuals to say the least. They had all gathered to hear the CEO of my company give a presentation about “The Politics of International Business”…sounds so boring…right? What they got instead was a sincere message from an incredible man about his family, faith and business.

He spoke about the explosive growth our company experienced in the past 10 years, and he also detailed the anguish of watching the company stock go from $70 to $2 within 6 weeks. I was completely captivated by his personal story and journey of the past six months. Above all, I was completely shocked and inspiried with his transparency about his faith. He didn’t hold back in this very initimidating room. He let everyone know that “with God, all things are possible” and when he was asked how he managed his way through it all, he simply said, “I have to be honest…I pray alot. And through prayer, I gain the wisdom and strengh I need to do my job.”

He described his job as CEO of a Fortune 500 company as a ministry.

Maybe you’ll never be in “full time church ministry”, but you can inspire and change people right where you are. My CEO changed my life…and he’s not even a pastor.

My mind and emotions have been swimming in the deep end lately. I can’t believe I haven’t posted in 2 weeks. That’s the longest I’ve ever gone without spilling my guts for the world to read.

I think it’s time for some spillage, but I can’t seem to get my thoughts in order. Tomorrow, I will have a good post. I promise. I’m not a dead link. And I’m not a mom blog (even though I can hardly keep my mind of my precious little baby girl, June). Here’s what happened in the past 2 weeks:

1. We felt June kick on the outside of my tummy for the first time – magical.
2. We had house guests from Missouri.
3. We are welcoming Joshua White into our home tonight. This will be our first “face-to-face” with anyone from the internets.
4. My face has gotten fatter – I’m fairly sure of this even though my friends swear it’s not true.
5. French fries make my feet swell up, but I can’t seem to stay away from them.
6. I started watching the HBO series, Big Love. It’s just wrong.
7. We had a snow storm and 2 snow days.
8. God taught me some lessons.
9. I miss my blog friends.

Is there such a thing as reasonable fear with the Lord?

I hear statements like, “Every good parent worries for their child.” and I can’t help but wonder if it’s true. Fear is the opposite of faith…so are we just comforting ourselves and making excuses for our fear?

I want to live FREE of fear and the promises in the Word tell me I can. Right???!?!?!?!?!

As I continue to experience more and more intimacy with the Lord, I also experience more and more times where I feel far away from Him, dirty and sinful. I allow fear to creep into my life and – POOF – I’m like a fatherless child with no where to run when only days before that I was resting comfortably in His arms.

When I feel far from God, I feel like I’m no closer to God than the meth addict in the back alley. Is that true? Has my sin made me as destitute as the liar or thief who has never accepted Jesus? Am I hopelessly searching for a close relationship with God when all I’ll find is a shameful girl and a distant father?

In searching for these answers, I realized I was asking the wrong question. The question isn’t if I’m guilty, dirty and far from God. The question is: Why can’t I accept my righteousness in Christ? Because there is no more sin. I’ll say it again – THERE IS NO MORE SIN!!!

2 Corinthians 5:21 – God made the one who knew no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we would become the righteousness of God.

Did you hear that? I’m the righteousness of God. I’m the righteousness of God. I’M THE RIGHTEOUSNESS OF GOD…

and I refuse to believe otherwise!

Mark and I have had a long and personal journey in 2008. Now that we have our little miracle baking in the oven, I am finding that I don’t want to talk about it much with others.

I don’t want to hear about your sister who also had a miscarriage, I don’t want to hear your delivery horror stories, I don’t want to pray with you about it, I don’t want to tell you my baby names, I don’t want to hear your opinion on having twins (no, I’m not having twins), I don’t want you to ask me if I’m drinking enough water and I don’t want you to touch my belly (unless I have explicitly invited your hand there.) People have actually scrunched up their noses when I told them my baby names – who wants that!?!?!?

I don’t think this is selfish of me, more than anything, I’m trying to stay away from negative comments that would bring fear into my heart. I’m burying this promise deep in my heart so you can’t trash it or give me your negative opinion about it.

Or…maybe I’m just hormonal!

Mark beautifully recounted the memorial service that we attended yesterday for the miraculous life of Mason.

The young couple that lost Mason never knew Jesus, attended a church service or even prayed before they found out about the fate of their precious child. When the doctors told them at just 5 months pregnant that Mason wouldn’t live more than 10 minutes after birth, they found the closest church (ORCC) and gave their lives to Christ.

I got to meet them shortly after they started attending ORCC, and they have radically changed my life. Their faith, their understanding of the Word, their hunger for the Holy Spirit – it all took me by surprise. How could such “baby Christians” already have such an amazing grasp on loving Jesus? Shouldn’t their faith be shaken? Shouldn’t they lose hope faster than I do? Even now, after they lost Mason, they are still an inspiration and encouragement to me.

It makes me wonder what I may have lost in translation being raised in church. Have I become numb by reciting “church-isms”, singing songs, and quoting scripture that I don’t fully understand myself? Did faith lose it’s true meaning as I was praying for my 10-speed bike to be fixed and my barbie to be found? Did Jesus become a character like Santa or the tooth fairy?

What would it be like if I heard the Word and accepted Jesus as my savior for the first time NOW as an adult? Lord, I pray that I can hear your Word and follow your Holy Spirit with passion as if today was the first day I ever knew you.

Thank you, Mason…

• Recently, I lost my blackberry curve. (issued and paid for by work) I have decided to make the embarrassing confession to my IT department and boss this week.
• Last week, my iPhone battery died with no hope of resuscitation. The friendly people at the Apple store gladly swapped it for a brand new iPhone in a matter of 10 minutes.
• Unfortunately, the new iPhone keeps disconnecting my work email and also has a broken button. I see another trip to the Apple store in my future.

Do you think God is trying to tell me something?