Little did we know that those 40 days would become an open door for God to start to change our lives in a way that we had never experienced. We gave up certain foods which wasn’t hard, but the daily devotion and prayer with our family was actually a struggle. We were surprised that we weren’t “better” at doing this.

This past year, God has launched an all out RAID in our lives. I use the word raid because nothing else can describe it. Everything has changed – and I mean everything. From the way we communicate, to the way we pray, to the way we hurt for the lost. Even the way we desire each other and desire the Lord has changed (all for the good I might add). All areas in our life are more passionate and filled with revelation. We recognize that this didn’t happen overnight, but God was whispering to us to draw near to him.

This year, we are observing Lent again and it has taken on a new meaning in the light of the amazing year we have had with the Lord. We have given up TV (which is a gigantic sacrifice for us) and we can already see our hearts changing in less than a week.

God is drawing all men unto himself. Are you prepared to resist him or pursue him? It’s really one or the other.

I’ll keep this updated with my weight loss. 50 more pounds to go…

I’ve started the HCG diet. I actually started on Monday with 2 days of “calorie loading” or “gorging”. It was pretty funny how unsatisfying it was to eat myself into a coma – I thought it was going to be a wonderful treat, but I just ended up feeling bloated and even worse about myself.

It’s now day 2 of eating very low calories and taking the HCG drops. I’ve lost 3 pounds after the first day and I’m so excited to weigh again tomorrow.

I’m writing this all down so I can look back for inspiration and encouragement. I can do it. I’ve done it before. I can do it again. I’m not quite ready to share my starting weight with the internet world, but I will tell you that I have 60 lbs to lose!!!!

Here’s to the new me!

Every part of me wants to be brave and act like I’m feeling and doing great. The truth is…I’m terrified. What if my baby won’t sleep through the night, what if she has colic, should I use a pacifier? It seems everyone has an opinion about these things (a very strong opinion) and there’s so much judgement in motherhood. My friend can’t get the hang of breast feeding and she gets treated like she threw her baby down a well. The pressure is already mounting up!

As I ponder these things, I will continue to waddle around, put my feet up, and eat popsicles…

I think it’s time for some spillage, but I can’t seem to get my thoughts in order. Tomorrow, I will have a good post. I promise. I’m not a dead link. And I’m not a mom blog (even though I can hardly keep my mind of my precious little baby girl, June). Here’s what happened in the past 2 weeks:

1. We felt June kick on the outside of my tummy for the first time – magical.
2. We had house guests from Missouri.
3. We are welcoming Joshua White into our home tonight. This will be our first “face-to-face” with anyone from the internets.
4. My face has gotten fatter – I’m fairly sure of this even though my friends swear it’s not true.
5. French fries make my feet swell up, but I can’t seem to stay away from them.
6. I started watching the HBO series, Big Love. It’s just wrong.
7. We had a snow storm and 2 snow days.
8. God taught me some lessons.
9. I miss my blog friends.

1. Not blog for a week
2. Watch TV all night long with your hubby and neglect the dishes, laundry and dirty bathrooms
3. Admit that some parts of pregnancy suck
4. Avoid the person that makes comments about certain body parts getting bigger
5. To be nervous that you won’t get to buy yourself new clothes because you’ll be buying new clothes for the baby
6. To be hungry at 8 am, 11 am, 12:30 pm, 3 pm, 6 pm, and 9 pm
7. To ask your hubby get you water, your special pillow, your laptop, a snack and the remote (in the course of 10 minutes)

Anything you need to remind yourself not to feel guilty about???

1. Going to work in yesterday’s makeup is NEVER a good idea.
2. You like peas now that you’re pregnant.
3. You don’t like onions now.
4. When you have to pee in the middle of the night, it’s not as easy to “roll” out of bed.
5. You put your keys in your jacket pocket last night instead of in your purse.
6. Go ahead and get the size Medium in maternity clothes instead of the XXL in regular clothes, you’ll feel better about yourself.
7. When you feel tired on Wednesday and you call Mark to tell him you’re not coming to church, you will regret it.

• I sat down in my bosses office to let him know I wasn’t satisfied with my review. Before I could say two words, I was sobbing like a baby and couldn’t catch my breath. The poor man didn’t know what to do. I’m pretty sure I didn’t make any sense and made a complete fool out of myself. I haven’t cried at work in the 4 years I’ve been here. It was humiliating.
• During our lovely Valentine’s date, I yelled at the sweet movie attendant about the parking situation before bursting into tears and demanding our money back. Again, humiliated. Good thing Mark saved the night by getting me calm and taking me home for a movie.
• I have been craving doughnut holes for weeks. This morning, I finally went to the quaint, local doughnut shop by our house to indulge myself only to be sold STORE BOUGHT, STALE doughnut holes – Winchell’s, I will cut you.  As soon as I got in my car, I cried.

I admit…I think I would have cried about the doughnuts – hormones or not!

The best vacation I ever went on was to Cancun with Markie on our honeymoon. Margaritas and french fries on the beach are delightful combination. We wanna go back before the baby comes (sans the margaritas).

What’s the best vacation you’ve ever had??? OR Where’s your dream vacation???